Friday, April 26, 2013

The Elephant in the Room

(Not the clicking one, thank sweet baby Jesus.)

No, I'm referring to this echoing void that has become of my blog for the past few months. I have this raging guilt about letting it stagnate, but at the same time have been utterly uninspired to write. So, essentially, it's been a combo of me all GUYS, DO YOU FORGIVE ME? WAIT COME BACK mixed with OMG YOU GUYS GET OFF ME ALREADY I'M JUST TRYING TO EAT SOME CHEETOS.

I'm not an easy woman to love.

And, speaking of Cheetos! Sure, I just ate some, but that's besides the point. I know I mentioned fitness in my last post, and that's actually a lot of what's been eating up my time. I spend a disproportionate amount of time at the local YMCA, contemplating things like the existence of Didactic Pirate's doppelganger (he lives in Texas, y'all, and he enjoys Body Pump class!), counting my calories on this machine that my husband likes to refer to as The Gazelle, and watching my son become best friends with this ancient man named Peter who gives him coins every morning when we see him. It's basically the cutest thing ever, so you can tell your kids to go ahead and quit. I've already had the talk with the neighborhood ones.
The Gazelle.

Plus I'm trying to find a job, and that is really time consuming and stressful and also annoying because, OMG I HAVE TO GO BACK TO WORK?! Out of at least 30 applications, I have had exactly one interview. And it was with a school that may or may not have made the news for rumors about its ties to terrorism. But, hey! A job's a job, amirite!?

Ugh. Life and stuff.

But I also feel completely out of touch with all of you guys! I haven't been reading your blogs or even stalking anyone on Twitter lately. I've only really been on Instagram, where I've documented the scorpion I found in my bedroom, the sustained stupidity of my cats, my kid learning to frickin READ and ride a bike WITHOUT TRAINING WHEELS, and discovered the existence of Instagram Thrifting. (It's a bizarre subculture, letmetellyou. Let's talk about it.)

Anyway, if you're out there, accept my apology for neglecting you so. Or at least a take handful of Cheetos. Shit, I'm gonna eat the whole damn bag.