Tuesday, April 17, 2012

About that Saffron...

My husband's been working in Morocco for the past two or three weeks. Before he left, we were chatting with a friend about her husband's recent trip to the African country. Apparently, they'd had some words over a missed business opportunity.

Her: Yeah, I remember, when he came back, how he talked about how inexpensive things like coffee and spices were. So I was waiting for him to pull some out of his suitcase.

Him: [Not present to confirm or deny these allegations.]

Her: And he went on to describe saffron that he saw at one of the local markets, which was being sold with scoops and plastic bags, and that's when I had to stop him. You brought some back, right? And he's like, [drops voice an octave] brought what back? UM, SAFFRON? [drops voice again] What the hell is saffron? At which point my head exploded...

Immediately, I turned away from my friend and directly to my husband. It was mind-bullet time.

BRING BACK THE SAFFRON, HUSBAND. IT IS YOUR DESTINY.

And he knew. Oh, HE KNEW.

Fast-forward to just a few hours ago, when I had the chance to video chat with the man of the hour. He'd just finished his shopping for souvenirs and was showing off his collected wares.

Him: ...[digging through his bags] and...I got like a kilo of coffee...

Me: A KILO? Isn't that drug-trafficking terminology? It's not wrapped in plastic, is it?


Him: [Unphased.] Oh. And the saffron. I got 1/4 pound for you and 1/4 pound for your friend.

Me: AHHHHSUUUUM.

We exchanged pleasantries (no, I will not show you my boobs) and said our goodbyes, and I immediately took to Twitter to announce my new business plan.


Then I locked myself away in the upstairs office to develop our business plan as the orders started pouring in.

(Relatively speaking.)

And really, everything was going swimmingly. I was just about to text him with directions to buy! buy! BUY! more of the stuff when my phone buzzed.

Then, the bubble burst.


I didn't have the heart to ask him about the coffee.