Friday, July 10, 2009

(My Cat Hopes) I'm a Winner!

I have no plans to post today because I've entered two very exciting contests. This means that I'm pretty much expecting someone to show up at my door any second now with balloons and sparklers and maybe some grown-up in a Rainbow Brite costume. I was originally hoping for Ed McMahon, and all, but with his death I'm thinking ol' RB is a reasonable alternative.

Or maybe they'll just send an email. But it better have a fucking emoticon.

So right, I'm pretty much banking on winning either this:


(which would be cool because I haven't brushed my teeth yet today, and gum is great for suppressing the urge to maintain oral health.)

Or this:
(Which would be great because I could totally give this to my hub for our Anniversary and he'll be all WHERE DID YOU GET THE MONEY, YOU STRIPPER! but he won't mean it, it's just because he's feeling guilty because he forgot to get me a present again.)

Oh, and to the winner-selecter-ers out there, if I win neither, I'm going to do this:


Unless you want PETA on your ass because you forgot to put cat murdering in the fine print.

13 comments:

  1. Mad photoshopping skillz! Where did you hone your trade? Can I take some lessons?

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  2. i think you should work that cat regardless of winning. send a message...you know?

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  3. Hey! I'm totally going to win that gum, so don't hold your breath. Or hold it...if you want. It doesn't effect me either way. Mmmhmm.

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  4. I'm gonna win the gum so both of you better just go buy a damn toothbrush and get away before I cut someone.

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  5. If you don't turn that killing the cat pic into some sort of award, you're doing humanity a disservice.

    That is all.

    If your husband asks you where you got the money, tell him you taught your son to do the shell game on the corner for nickels.

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  6. Benny (whoops he's NOT Benny) is right. There are tons of blogs out there that deserve an FOS Award. (Please don't give it to me....I have a fragile ego)!

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  7. expat: Yes, I will teach you. But the Paint chooses you, you cannot choose the Paint. (Was that Kung-Fu-ish sounding? Because that's what I was going for.)

    Jerrod: It's never funny until someone kills a cat. Then it's hilarious. Also, illegal, "immoral" and some other bad things that probably negate the humor.

    erin: Are you trying to tell me that if I held my breath for so long that I DIED, you wouldn't care? Because that, my friend, is not very nice.

    Nikki: You'll be too stunned to cut me if I blow my bad breath IN YOUR FACE! HAHA!

    NotBenny: Does the shell game involve him wearing shells like a hula girl? Because I think that make the hub even more angry.

    Cortico: My blog is probably at the top of that list.

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  8. That cat has nothing to fear. There's no trigger on that gun!

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  9. I hope you lose. That cat looks up to no good.

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  10. "gum is great for suppressing the urge to maintain oral health."

    What a line. So true.

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  11. i so wanted to win that gum. now i think i might have to make myself a present, hold a fake contest, and award it to myself to make me feel better about being a loser. do you want me to make you a present too?

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  12. I hope you lose. That cat looks up to no good.

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  13. That cat has nothing to fear. There's no trigger on that gun!

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