Plus, remember that part yesterday where I was all jokey-jokemaker and all saying "OUCH-type, OUCH-type" or something?
Today, I'm for serious. My HANDS are even sore. Let's not even discuss the rest of my body because it will totally make you lose respect for me. Or at least picture me as less than completely in-shape and utterly attractive.
Maybe the worst part is the sunburn. Again, I'll blame my naivete, but I see these landscaper dudes and they're all perfectly tan from every angle! Me? Well, you know those pictures of people who have attempted to put sunscreen on themselves only to be sunburned with, like finger-patterned streaks of white? I'm pretty much rocking that look. Even though I put the sunscreen on while looking at the mirror. Also? No sun anywhere other than on my back, neck and about a three-inch stretch of my right arm. It's pretty much the sexiest thing you've ever not seen. I tried to take a picture of the finger-streaks on my back, but it's awkward taking a picture of yourself, and the image kind of looks like I've taken a picture of my curvacious hips or even maybe my back-tat region, and I'm not quite ready to take this blog to that level.
I will, however, show you my amazing skills.
Naturally, I never took a "before" shot because I'm intelligent like that. But just imagine this as what it looked like before: