Him: Well, why don't we just hang it from the corner of the house?
Me: The directions said you can't hang it on siding.
Him: So just because it's on the directions, you listen?
Me: Well, yeah. It pretty much says "do what I tell you" in fine print.
Him: So let me get this straight...
Him: If it's written on a piece of paper...[dramatic pause] you have no problem complying?
Me: Wait a second...I don't think I like where this is going.
Me: You better watch yourself or I'm going to put you on the Internet again.
Him: [drafting a contract] What?